Friday, April 25, 2014

More Than Just a Walk

Urban Hiking is more than just a walk around town.

It's a chance to reflect on the day. Time to blow off steam. Time to push through the pain or the rain. A chance to get out and enjoy the sunshine and the fact that I can move my body.

Yesterday was a day for reflection and time to consider my feelings.

I've been living with my mother for the past almost four years. (Long story short, I lost my job and times were tough so I moved home for a while. Things are picking up and I'll be moving out this summer.) We've had some challenges as we figure out the mother-daughter, two adult women living together, roommate situation. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.

Yesterday we had a chat about a recent situation that caused her to worry about me. I appreciate that she was concerned about me, but I didn't want to tell her everything about the situation. But knowing my mother, she is an information sponge. She wants to know as much info as she can about any given situation. It was uncomfortable for her to not know. I appreciate that she was concerned and shared with me on Wednesday night a request to know a little bit more than just "I'm going out with a friend."

So as I walked I pondered her request and my feelings about it as I walked. The old me would have gone home and had verbal "feelings diarrhea" -- over-shared my feelings in response to her request. I've learned that this is not a safe behavior for me (with anyone, not just mom). I need to sit with my feelings and just feel them. It was an interesting experience to just feel and not share. It felt safe to keep it just to myself. I like this new power to keep my feelings safe.

Today's walk was many things. It was a rare sunny day in Seattle and I had been stuck in the office all day so I NEEDED to get outside and enjoy the sunshine. I also needed to earn extra calories! I hit another 10 pound benchmark so my food tracking program reduced my daily calorie allotment. I like to eat so I needed to earn more calories so I could have a decent dinner.

My reflection from today's walk: I'm getting bored with my walking routes. I need to explore and create new routes!

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